wow.. 3rd post in sept

Well not too crazy....

Well work is crazy. I really hate what I am doing.... boss is much better... at times.. she doesn't explain stuff that great... i mean I am only doing this for a short time. I am sure I still have allot to learn!

Kids are good. its very crazy at times... by 830 this morning.. I had lost my patients... not good. both didn't nap well. did get my Halloween decorations mostly out today.... Just need to get some mums to put out by the tree.

Lost my cell phone in kohl's, thank god some good person turned it in.. that could have been ugly...

I think right now Pete and loris wedding is off. heather talked to Pete, and it seems that Lori has been cheating on him... for a while. WOW I was shocked. I don't know how someone can keep the two things straight. I know I couldn't..... Really...... I know that is only one side of the story, just Pete's... today at heather party, Lori said that Pete is acting stupid, and she doesn't thing the march wedding is going to go on then... Well why was he acting stupid? Pete said he caught her, and she denied it to his face. I guess that is the easy thing to do. I guess...... why would you take and throw something away something that you have been in for more then 4 years? just doesn't make sense. well I guess enough on that... I guess we will have to see what Lori has to say....

well off to bed on that note...
I think tomorrow. is Harmon's, get some mums, most likely shop rite...... oh yea and the bank that we didn't' make it to today.....

wow... two post in one week.

work is crazy. I hate what I am doing... it so crazy, you hardly have time to go to the bathroom... and everyone seems to think you are only doing there stuff.. people take forever to do corrections. And they just keep piling on the work....

Nickolas is really enjoying preschool, i think even more so since Alexander is in his class. We have back to school night in a few weeks.. His pictures are next Tues. God wasn't he just born????

Carol and I are going to take a baking class for four weeks starting next month.. and also we are going to do ceramics.. once a month Oct, Nov, DEC. Said that we will be making something for each holiday.. So I am guessing Halloween, thanksgiving, and Christmas.. should be fun..

Nickolas is going to be mickey for Halloween, and MacKenzie is going to be Minnie, Christoffer is also going to be mickey... I wanted to make Nickolas Pluto or goofy.. but the costumes where going for between 40 and 60 dollars... that is plain just crazy..

well.......

has it really been that lon??

WOW, i haven't posted since may... I guess it would be a bit easier if I could get on at work and post from there. Sometimes at night I am just way to tired to sit here and think about what I want to say or would like to say.

Work... ughhh that word...Carol left to become a stay at home mom.. she didn't have a choice. Her mom wasnt' well. So of course you know I got more work.. I am up to my eyeballs in work. I am feeling very overwelmed, that at times I could just break down and cry! (almost did yesterday) The desk is piled with papers, you hardly know where to jump in. I am hoping with time, I get a better grip on what I am doing and it will go smoother.. of courses no raise with it though.......

Nickolas started preschool in winfield, as did carol son alexander. He seems to like it, I was a bit worried since he was use to going to school for over 8 hours, and now its just 2 1/2 hours a day. We have back to school night comming soon. I will see how he is doing them....

Rob stopped working at fed ex at night, he made it a year. It was just too much physical work, on top of an 9 hour day of regular work.

I have really been in a funk lately, not sure why, but really need to get out of it. Everything, everyone is driving me crazy.

ok maybe I will get a nap in before the kids get up....

hopefully next time it will not be 4 months before I post again...

way too much time between post

Well goodness it has been a long time since my last post. Just cant find the time to get on and blog. I can't gen on from work, which is when I have the five minutes to do so.

Ok so let see. Aruba..... ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, Have I told you I love aruba. The moment I step on the soil, I feel like I am at home. Does that make any sense? I guess not to everyone but to me it does. (one time I thought about moving there!) We had a great time, way way too short. Rob had a very hard time relaxing. Not me. Give me a book, the sand the beautiful water, and I am set. We had a great dinner at the flying fish bone. We sat with our feet in the water, and watched the beautiful sun set! What a cool once in a life time thing. We did some site seeing. Did the beach, rob even went into the water, and walked on the sand without his shoes.(Rob hates the sand!) Did the pool, had some drinks. Did some shopping, both MacKenzie and I got blue dimonds! My next want is black dimonds. Did I tell you I could live there? I really would like to get some time share there. Once day we will. I think rob really enjoyed himself. Seemed like as soon as we landed it was time to go home. I did miss the kids. Leaving on sunday was really hard, I fought back my tears, rob wasn't so lucky. Especally when Nickolas said I want to go with you! Thank you mom for watching the kids! Next time they will go with us. I wish we didnt go all inclusive,there were so many other reserants I would have love to tried. I wish we stayed a bit longer. ah but I made it there after 14 year abs!

We got back to our sitter being sick, then she broke her toe, she has been out since march 30th. I have been so pissed off about that. What is the differance between her sitting at home, and sitting here? I know rob would really like to get rid of her, but right now no other choices. (another story) Thank god mom isn't working and she has been watching the kids. I have been paying her(would rather pay her anyway!), even though she doesn't want the money. I hope she socks it away for when she needs it. She did take a well deserved vacation to visit her friend in FLA. I am so glad she went. We had to do some rearranging with baby sitting, but we made it threw. While mom was away rob had to take a day off, and lost mackenzie blankie... boy that upset me!
March 20 my oldest friend lara, had a baby boy, (she didn't know what she was having, and i guessed a boy!) Aidan George McFall. Cute he is. I hope I am able to get down soon and see her, and meet Aidan. I hope I can talk rob into going to fla in November. Cross my fingers.

Have been trying to get ready for MacKenzie 1st birthday. God can you believe she is going to be one in two weeks. Where the hell has the last year gone? She is going to have a princes party.. Because she is my princess. I waited a long long long time for her!

I need to get some pictures up on here.

Winfield was supose to start a full day preschool that Nickolas would attend. That would mean MacKenzie could go to Kindercare for two days or so.. Meaning we would need Linda less. WEll don't you know that the state ran out of money, so they are only doing 1/2 day. which doesn't help us one bit. WINFIELD DO YOU HEAR ME YOU MESSED UP ALL MY FRIGGIN PLANS!!!! YOU SO SUCK!!! So I don't know what we are going to do now... I think we are gong to try and wing it til MacKenzie turns 18 months and then re look at it. I want her to have all the opertunites that Nickolas had! I dont ever want to hear she got more then me, or he got to do more then me.

Ok I guess I have bitched enough.. I am going to try and get on here more and blog...
til the next time
ME>>>

lordy lordy looks who is 40!!!

Well 40 finally hit me on March 5. I had a really hard time with it that day!Not really too sure why, but I was upset all day. I guess for starters, since I moved dept, Not one person wished me a happy birthday. Not even my old dept, who would know my birthday. This year alone we have had luncheons for all that hit milestone birthday, and I went in on all of them, and what do I get..... it shoved up my ass! Allot of my online friends wished me happy birthday on fb, It made me cry. Rob didn't even send flowers, i would have though he would since it was a big birthday!!! Nor did anyone else. I really had a bad day, and I couldn't wait for it to get over! On my way home from work, I cried my eyes out! For turning 40, for no one even acknowledging it at work, this really hurt me! Rob thinks I should have said something, but that is so not me! Rob called out of work and we all where to go out to dinner, (rob and I, the kids, mom and dad, heather Joe, Christoffer, and i guess Dee) Heather and Joe backed out, because his dad came in due to a death in the family. But I think heather still could have went. This really upset me again! That his family came/comes first.
We went to a brick oven pizza place, and then we went to this new cupcake place. huge cupcakes, they were good.
We are had a brunch for my bday the following Sunday.
Rob bought me a GPS. Mostly money for my bday, carol made my cakes, and bought me earring's.
I would have thought someone would have bought something memorable for my 40, but i guess I must live in a fantasy world!

so aruba it is...

So last post I was really pissed off because we weren't going to aruba.
We searched and searched on what to do. Mom finally said if she wants to go take her, I will watch the kids, as long as it a long weekend. NICE!!
So now we start looking for us going, of course since its only like 5 weeks til, we can not get out on the day we want to go, or cant get back when we want. Prices are still crazy...

finally presidents day we find a ok price all inclusive, leaving 22nd comming home on the 26. (wanted to go on 19= come home on the 24th) well as long as we are going,

We booked it, I am so excited, but also nervouse leaving the kids. I said that to rob, I guess when you finally become parents you start to thing about things like that!

So now try and get ready for aruba.... yippie!

men, and what is wrong with them?

ugh, the subject of men, and what is wrong with them!

My 40th birthday is coming up quickly. Last year rob said something about throwing me a party at a restarant we both love. It seems that it fell threw. Kinda of glad do not like being the center of attention.

Now it came out a few weeks ago, that he was going to take me away. He kinda asked what I would like to do. Of course I said I want to go to aruba. Or basiclly a island!

So he is working on this, in the mean time I get move in depts. So I told him better make sure ok to go away. He does and its all ok.

My first clue given to me was my last day of work would be march 17, and first day back would be march 30, nice no?

It kinda comes up that we are not going to aruba, (he thinks its too costly for us) Kinda makes mention that the kids might need passports> Having me thinking we are still going to an island someplace. Ok good.

Now I really start thinking about it.. and say to him aruba, he says no, I say are we leaving the contanental usa? He says no. So now I know where we are going FLA! I am kinda of pissed off about that. (he has family there) Now is this how I want to spend my vacation with family? in FLA?

So last night I say there are three things that will really piss me off about this trip, he says what so I do not make any mistakes because its not booked yet. I told him to figure them out! I end up telling him.
1) mets (spring training) he says no.
2) relativies (says could be) (so now I really know we are going to fla)
3) anyone going with us. (yes says yes but she isn't staying with us)(WTF?????) (she is afraid to fly) again WTF???

He spills all the beans, we would be staying within a quick drive from her, i am sure she would be in on some of our outings...we aren't at the beach, some place called springer island?
does this man listen to me at all??? its my birthday, and i would think he would want to please me for my birthday.

We had a bit of a blow out, I am pissed off as he is also!

I told him he didn't listen to me one bit, he said we can not afford aruba, i said well according to you we will never be able to. and he said you are proably right.
I am so tired of hearing that..
He said we go to aruba for 3 days with carol, and I will stay home with the kids.. NOT THE POINT i told him, i don't want to go there with her, I want to go with you.

why is it that he can not listen.
I am at the point to tell him to go on vacation with his mother, and I will stay home with the kids...
Wonder how she got thrown into the mix?!!?!?
"Will men ever listen?"

unbelievable!

Well yesteday I was told that I will be moving dept at my job.And there reason was because I have banking background. What kinda of shit is that? How its good to know more jobs, blah blah blah..... To say the least I am totally pissed off. Oh where to being on this one. Of the 5 other workers in my dept. As they all sit back and say ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh it wasn't me.... Three of them have less time in the dept then me, one of which has been with the company less time. Why wasn't one of them chosen? No it was me that they chose! I do not want to work for that supervior, total b-tch. I don't want to do what that dept does. I love what I do now.
And I also have to go back to the old discusting building. They so tried to sugar coat the whole thing, I know I should be glad to have a job with the way the ecomonany is going. But If you hate what you are doing, you don't even want to get out to go to work. Maybe I don't suck enough ass,(not happening!) Maybe I speak the wrong language. Who knows. I don't have to like this and I am not going to. Maybe they are trying to push me out, make me quit for hating my job. I just don't know what to think, nor do I believe anything anyone says....
My supervisor, who happens to be my sister sil, said she had no say in it. Not sure If I believe that either. Right now I so feel like an outsider.

Trying my hand at this

Well I use to journal alot, but for some reason stopped.
Well I have two children, Nickolas who just turned 3 on 1-31-09, and Mackenzie, who was born 5-31-08.
I really never thought that I would never have children. I guess better late then never. I really would like one more, but I am sure that isn't in the cards! Which makes me very sad! The though of never being pg again makes me sad. Maybe if my cards had been dealt a different way, maybe I would be able, or had one more. Maybe the dh will give in, (doubt that!)
I was married once before, which was probaly a mistake, now looking back on it. However, if I hadn't married back then, I would have never met my current dh.
I guess the saying is true everything happens for a reason.
40 is slowly sneaking up on me. Which is kinda of scary. How did I turn around one day and 40 was stairing me in the face?!?!?
I work full time, for an overseas freight consuladator. I like what I do. It's crazy sometimes here, but I like it.